Wednesday , 18 September 2019
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Beer Parlour Gist

Result before (s)election

Our man in Owerri has revealed that governor Rochas Okorocha offered the state’s Resident Electoral Commissioner (REC) 2bn Naira (roughly $1m) to “write” the result of the vote for the governor.  Okorocha was also open to “top up” the amount if the RECe felt it wasn’t enough. The REC was asked to write whatever result Okorocha wanted and that the …

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Jega will be sacked next week

Our source in Abuja claims Attahiru Jega, the electoral commission boss will be sacked next week. The official reason will be the voters card debacle, with many Nigerian voters still to get theirs. The real reason is that Jega is seen as a Buhari sympathiser by Goodluck Jonathan and no longer trusted.   Follow @naijiant

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Breaking: (S)elections postponed for six weeks!

Our source claims electoral commission (INEC) boss Attahiru Jega will announce a postponement of the (s)elections this evening.  The (s)elections will be held in six weeks time rather than on 14 February. He had a meeting with the president last night and was told the (s)elections should be postponed because of the difficulties with getting voters cards to voters.  Another …

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“Alhaji” Rochas Okorocha’s plan for 2019

Our man “on ground” claims that Imo State governor Rochas Okorocha has his eyes on a 2019 run for president. He has been secretly seeking the support of influential Muslim northern Nigerians.  But they allegedly told him that they would only support his bid if he could “sensitise” more Igbos towards Islam and Muslims, making them more sympathetic to the …

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See me see EFCC

It seems that when Nuhu Ribadu was boss of the Economic Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) he actually did put the fear of EFCC into many people. A guy that works in Abuja for the Federal Capital Development Authority (FCDA) said that during Ribadu’s time staff were actually afraid of doing side deals.  He claimed that as soon as soon as …

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Goodluck to Naijas in London

Goodluck Jonathan has escaped the heat of Nigeria’s campaign for the cold of London. He will be speaking at Porchester Hall in Bayswater on Saturday in what has been billed as “An evening with Mr President: A dialogue with Nigerians in the Diaspora”. Our correspondent has been invited, but doesn’t think the president is important enough to cancel his other …

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To flee or not to flee

Many Nigerians fear there will be serious violence whoever “wins” the (s)election on 14 February. We have form in this sort of thing.  About 500 people, mostly in northern Nigeria, were estimated to have died after Goodluck Jonathan was declared the winner in 2011.  They were allegedly angry that Muhammadu Buhari lost out. Buhari is running again and the opposition …

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Everybody run, run, run, everybody scatter, scatter

Last November, Ike Ekweremadu, the deputy senate president deployed his “Ikeoha Foundation” to provide free eye tests to villagers in Akama-Oghe in his Enugu West constituency, possibly as a voter-bribery tactic. As hundreds of them gathered at the test centre in St Theresa’s Church, they were ambushed by thugs loyal to governor Sullivan Chime.  Paraphrasing Fela from his song “Sorrow, …

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Buhahari declares War Against Indiscifline on Fashola & Okorocha

Our man on the ground said APC presidential candidate Muhammadu Buhahahari is not amused by statements made recently by APC governors Babatunde Fashola and Rochas Okorocha of Lagos and Imo States. Fashola described the PDP candidate for Lagos State governor Jimi Agbaje as “already 60, he cannot cope with this job. If you call him at night he will not take …

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Chimaroke Nairamania

Ex governor of Enugu State and ex senator Chimaroke Nnamani will be showing up at a rally today at Nike Lake Grammar School in Enugu, as he tries to return to the senate under the newly-formed People for Democratic Change (PDC). Anyone that shows up is guaranteed 2,000 Naira, assuming you get past hungry areaboys to get your share. 2,000 …

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